Posted in Brothers, Christmas, Holidays, Mom, The Husband

Christmas Lying

when you're not looking
when you’re not looking

We never did the whole ‘Santa thing’.  Different reasons for different seasons.  The Dark Ages gave us the “Santa is Satan spelled wrong” Era.  In the next era, upon my adoption at the age of 16, all we needed was love, and hence, the obsoleteness of the jolly ol’ creepster.

What we do have is Mom.  And Christmas magic.  Because we have Mom.  She has more Christmas Spirit than the North Pole full of elves.  She has the gift of preservation of holiday wonder.  She almost always finds a way to get us what we want, even if she has to scheme and connive to do so.  And completely baffle us in regards what we’re even getting.

One year, Evan stumbled across a brilliant idea.  Google the weight and dimension of various desired electronic items.  Measure the wrapped gifts under the tree.   Heft said present from hand to hand in an attempt to guess the weight.  She fired back, of course.

They are all wrapped in different wrapping, each one a throwback to brown paper wrapping with a variance.  Tied with red, green, or brown raffia.  Christmas Jammies, a Christmas Eve tradition, are marked in a secret manner which only she knows the code for.

If an item in question is a “big-ticket” item, it is disguised in some way.  It will either be wrapped inside a much larger box, or a box of significantly odd dimensions, and weighted evenly with things lying around the house, or paired with something whose shape will throw off the scent.  If all else fails, Christmas lying kicks in.

Christmas lying involves dropping fake hints.  Purposely ‘accidentally’ slipping in reference to what one child or another is receiving.  Round-about mentioning of vague requests for things.  Feigned ignorance.  A general command to stop prying and go get back to your chores.  Since it is Christmas, we take it all in good fun and attempt to outwit the wizard of Christmas magic.  As far as I am aware, she has not been outdone or one-upped.

I have been watching and learning.

This was my reward.

 

the glorious?
iPad for jim, What?!

It sat under my tree since Thanksgiving.  In a 24x24x24″ Diapers.com box.

This smile does not happen often.  Yet here it is.

Go me.

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I rock. I also paper and scissors.

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