Posted in Books, Trailer Park Diaries

Trailer Park Diaries

...where the grill is...
...where the grill is...

Chapter 1

They say home is where your heart is.   Whoever the ‘they’ is, I say they are wrong.  Home is where you chain your grill.  Pieces of equipment like grills should be taken seriously.  And chained to your back steps.  With a chain.  A big-ass white one.  From Lowes.  That way if anyone gets it into their head to ‘acquire’ what is rightfully your grill, they will have to go to the trouble of taking the whole gosh-durned trailer as well.  With the inhabitants.  And the Velveeta cookbook you so proudly display.  I want my mother-in-law to know I am doing right by her son.  Feeding him well and all that jazz.  Golly!  I forgot to pick it up last time I was at the bookstore!  I reckon I’ll see if the neighbors have one at their next yard sale.  That way I’ll have something to feed the ex-cons who stop by on their way out of town.  I betcha if I had a clothesline, I’d be their first stop on the escape from the chick prison, excuse me, Women’s Correctional Facility.



I rock. I also paper and scissors.

2 thoughts on “Trailer Park Diaries

  1. No trailer park is complete without babies running around half naked in the yard. This completes the park. Contribution bonus, 100%. Added 200% bonus is always a half naked baby with cowboy boots on.

    Oh wait!



Come on. Let it out. You know you want to.

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s